My mom said there's nothing that we can do now You should go while she's on her way out I couldn't help thinking of how We all had 10 years to figure this out Jenny had a nice job and nice house And a loving, supportive spouse Until she started messing around With drugs and booze, he was already on his way out She liked every song that I ever wrote And she printed out all my blog posts From myspace in 2007 To my demo tape 2011 She bought me a playstation 2 Said she understood what I’m going through She confided in me some of her pain And the problems she had with her brain I’m sorry I avoided the awkward confrontations and shady situations I can’t help but feel responsible, even though I know there’s nothing more I could have done I saw my future in you, I saw what will happen if I continue not to get help There’s nothing I wouldn’t do, to trade places now I wish I could bring you back somehow Christmas 2009 It was obvious things were not fine She forgot to get me a gift Filled my hand with valium and Percocet A couple dollars by accident My family's faces I will never forget I told them I was throwing them out Turned the corner, put them all in my mouth I’m sorry I avoided most of your phone calls; you were always needing money I didn't have I feel responsible knowing money I gave you just could have ended up in your arms I saw my future in you, I saw what will happen if I continue not to get help There’s nothing I wouldn’t do, to trade places now I wish I could bring you back somehow My mom said there's nothing we can do now They're maintaining body temperature now Then they’ll run another EKG And scan for any brain activity My mom said there's nothing we can do now We spent 10 years fucking beating around The bush so hard that we tore that shit out And now there's nothing we can do now Now she's on her way out

Hiding in my bedroom At a party that I threw I got too lit too fast I hope my roommates aren’t too mad You wanted to stay the night I said that my dog might bite Even though that’s not a lie It definitely was not why She says my songs sound happy but they’re secretly sad I said life’s just a party that you kill yourself at Just don’t listen to the words that’s the part that’s bad But those melodies are golden People always think that They make me uncomfortable I asked Correna why’s that She said it’s because they do When I asked to kiss you I wasn’t what you would do But I guess it worked out I felt my feet lift off the ground She says my songs sound happy but they’re secretly sad I said life’s just a party that you kill yourself at Don’t listen to the words that’s the part that’s bad But those melodies are golden

Ezra sent me an ass pic from the bathroom at Midas after my brakes went out with the Goodwill behind us. I said my dad could pick us up. Ralph said that's a personal goal of his to meet my dad. This is the second time in one week that Ralph was in a car that broke down in Kentucky. So next time I go to Kentucky I won't bring Ralph cus that mother fucker is unlucky in the South. I don't know what that's all about. Why is my boy so unlucky in the South? Jan brought with them a package that they need dropped off at amazon but that never happened. they regretted wearing a skirt as they climbed into the window at Maryellen's to let us in. Me and Ezra played tether ball until we both gave up after a few minutes trying to catch our breath. Ezra wondered out loud why he was worn out then he said oh yeah I've been drinking since 9 AM. so we left the score tied. We gathered up the dogs and went inside. strangely I felt like I was gonna cry. Like it was the last summer that I would be alive. Like I was gonna die.

Ezra sent me an ass pic from the bathroom at Midas after my brakes went out with the Goodwill behind us. Said my dad could pick us up. Ralph said that's a personal goal of his to meet my dad. This is the second time in one week that Ralph was in a car that broke down in Kentucky. So next time I go to Kentucky I won't bring Ralph cus that mother fucker is unlucky in the South. I don't know what that's all about. Why is my boy so dang unlucky in the South

How come preparing for Disaster only seems to make it come faster